Monday, December 10, 2012

Weigh-in, December 10: Never fear

Obviously, I did not reach my original goal of being out of the 180s by my birthday. I am, though, feeling confident that I can lose a few pounds by the end of the year and start 2013 off feeling good.

I am going to use my checklist, focus on cleaning up my meals, and get in a few extra workouts while I am on my semester break. I keep thinking about doing something more drastic, but I know would be only a short-term solution. Anything I can't sustain long-term isn't worth doing now. So sorry, no Paleo Challenge, but I do think it's a good idea to focus on Less Processsed like Roni, since I know that is something that will help.

December is a tough month for weight losers because there is food everywhere. Since the average person gains about a pound over the holidays, a goal to lose 1 pound per week (that would put me at 182.8 and out of the "obese" category) is swimming upstream, but I think it's doable. I may be making too much of that label but I don't want it in my life. I don't like the way it makes other people see me, and most of all, I don't like the way it makes me see me.  I want to feel strong and confident and fit.

I have posted a few times about how I hate the way other people seem to think of me as a beginner just because of the way I look, not realizing all of the history I have. I have a lot of fitness experience, a lot of knowledge, and just because my body is not reflecting this at this moment in time, I don't want to be treated like someone who has just stepped off the turnip truck and into the gym for the first time. Here's a well-meaning example: the writer thought that because she saw someone overweight in a workout class, that it was her responsibility to keep her from quitting with a kind remark. I think that her intentions were good, but that she probably triggered the same internal response I'd have to a remark like that, "I must look really awful if this stranger feels the need to comment." I would never verbally react in the same way, but I'd be annoyed too. The poster's defense that she cheers on all new people rings false to me. How does she know someone is new unless they stand out? This woman stood out to her because of her weight, not because she was new..  What would I want? To be treated just like any other person in the class.  Smile, say hi, but don't make a big deal out of it. No one wants to stand out when they are struggling. They want to feel like they look like they belong.

Speaking of looking like I belong, I ordered some new swimsuits and I'm hoping to have at least one that I like. The rest go back to Dick's Sporting Goods. I'm done ordering from places that don't have a way to do free returns. I stayed away from "aqua fitness suits" because I want a competition suit, one that looks like I'm serious about swimming, because I am.

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"Count your calories, work out when you can, and try to be good to yourself. All the rest is bulls**t." -- Jillian Michaels at BlogHer '07