Monday, August 31, 2009

Here goes nothing

After having lunch with a friend the other day and thinking a lot about how much our choices shape our lives and our health, I had been doing a lot of long, hard thinking about how that was working in my own life.

I have not lost weight this summer, even with all the exercise I've been doing. I have maintained or even gained a few pounds. There was one short time this summer when I started to lose a little -- when I was doing Weight Watchers Online. My momentum was short-lived, though, and when my subscription came up for renewal, I didn't renew it. I did a lot better with meetings -- when my heart was really in it. I've been thinking about what I really want, and losing that weight means a lot to me. Enough to take the chance of failing again.

Weight Watchers has a special deal on its monthly pass -- if you sign up for one month, you get a second month free. I decided it was time to try meetings again. Armed with a freshly-printed temporary pass, I am going to my first meeting this morning. If I don't like this meeting, I will try every meeting in my area until I find one that works for me.

My first weigh-in number will not be pretty. But I'm trying to remind myself that that's kind of the point.

I debated about telling my husband. I thought about going without saying anything. Sometimes I am afraid to tell him I'm trying to lose weight for fear of being monitored. He means well, but that kind of attention just makes me feel embarassed and self-conscious and sad. I want to do this my way without a lot of input from the peanut gallery. I figured, though, that it would be hard to make changes without him noticing. I told him, but also told him I'd rather not have any comments about what I was eating, how much I was exercising, etc. He promised to be supportive and not judgmental.

Let's hope we can both stick to it this time around.


  1. Good luck with the meetings! Hubbies try to help and sometimes are the exact opposite. God bless their cluelessness!

  2. Good luck with your meeting. I, too, went back to Weight Watchers after a a summer off. I didn't like the number on the scale, but I'm back and ready to take it off!

    Let me know if you need any motivation!

  3. good luck jen! hope it goes well... and hope the hubby behaves :)


"Count your calories, work out when you can, and try to be good to yourself. All the rest is bulls**t." -- Jillian Michaels at BlogHer '07