Monday, May 26, 2008

update, from the airport

I'm flying again today, coming back tomorrow. Then leaving Friday and coming back next Wednesday. I will be in five states between today and my return. Sounds like fun, eh? I love my beautiful new home, it's my favorite place in the world. And I'm a bit grouchy about the fact that I'm almost never there. Even last night, as I was enjoying a glass of wine with my husband in our back yard, my mind was just racing over all the things I wish were different in my life. I have to learn to relax and hope that things will change in their own time. Now you know what my trophy wife daydreams were all about. Still trying to sell our old house, family members with all kinds of health problems, and my lack of much time to deal with it all. I'm fat, resentful, and having a hard time appreciating all the good things about Fancy New Job and feeling nostalgic about Low-Paying but Low-Stress Graduate Assistantship.

I think of that song "Count Your Blessings" and feel bad for not focusing more on all the good things in my life: Tiny preemie nephew is doing well. My sister is out of the hospital and feeling fine. My dad is improving. Our old house is getting plenty of showings, one is bound to be to the right person. My husband is taking all my time away in stride and taking good care of me. My kitties are wonderful. Fancy New Job is creative and interesting work and I get to play with all the newest computer stuff. My 9-year-old Honda seems to be holding up beautifully to all its new demands. I love my house. We finally paid off the new appliances. My husband's school district finally signed their contract. I have my health -- which always sounded like a throwaway thing but I'm learning it means a lot!

So life is not so bad here, just busy.

4 comments:

  1. It's hard to focus on blessings all the time when life is dragging us here and there. The kind of traveling you do with Fancy Job means time away from your husband, kitties, and the home you love and share. Take it one trip at a time.

    Yeah, easy for me to say.

    Your list of blessings is pretty impressive, though. I'm really glad that preemie nephew is doing well. Travel safe!

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  2. so glad the baby is okay - I wondered all weekend and am glad you posted.

    have fun on your business trip.

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  3. I could use a bit of gratitude right now, it's not easy when we're feeling low. Glad you're able to see the good stuff.

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  4. I could use a bit of gratitude right now, it's not easy when we're feeling low. Glad you're able to see the good stuff.

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"Count your calories, work out when you can, and try to be good to yourself. All the rest is bulls**t." -- Jillian Michaels at BlogHer '07