Thursday, September 22, 2011

Learn about "Hustling for Worthiness"

I just listened to this interview with Brené Brown on Koren Motekaitis's radio show podcast and was totally blown away by it. They discuss the "hustle for worthiness" and the internal worthiness criteria that we all have (hint, they are usually completely impossible to achieve).  Surprise, surprise, for most women, appearance and body image are huge shame triggers.

I was especially interested when they talked about core beliefs.  Koren (who is a former champion swimmer) has a core belief that she's a "loser." Brené (who is an incredibly accomplished scholar) has a core belief that she is "lazy." Because beliefs are not evidence-based, they are difficult to combat.  I'm sure I have quite a few core beliefs, but "ugly" and "not good enough" leap to mind.  When I think about what could ever make me "not ugly" or "good enough," I realize that there is an internal voice that asks "HOW DARE YOU?" every time I contemplate feeling OK with who I am.

Deep stuff for a busy Thursday afternoon.  Had to take a break from my workday to share it with you. 

3 comments:

  1. Thanks for posting the link. I identified with much of the discussion - as I think most of us would. I was telling my hubby about it over dinner last night, and he got it, too.

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  2. I thought I should share my core beliefs - that I'm "stupid" and, when I'm having a fight with my husband, get really upset and break down and cry, I often sob, "I'm just a big fat joke!"

    And no prizes for guessing where these beliefs - particularly the second one - came from. I'll have to practise some cognitive behavioural therapy on myself.

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  3. downloading it right now! can't wait to listen :)
    PS i love how you share the deep stuff. this is why i save your blog for last when hit up google reader! :)

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"Count your calories, work out when you can, and try to be good to yourself. All the rest is bulls**t." -- Jillian Michaels at BlogHer '07