Sunday, July 01, 2007

counting it up

On Friday I knew I had eaten a lot of high-points stuff and really, really didn't want to count it all up. I just couldn't face the number. But then I found that yesterday, not knowing where I stood was making it easier to continue to make food choices that I knew weren't in my best interest. Sure, I enjoyed the snacks, the wine, the pasta, the bread... but I knew that I would continue to go crazy if I didn't just sit down, write everything out, and take the time to figure the points out. It only took a few minutes. It wasn't the hassle I was avoiding, it was the feeling of having messed up. Again.

It turns out that I'm in the hole on my Weekly Allowance Points by 19 right now. If I can draw a line in the sand and stop going over, I might still have a loss on Tuesday. Even if I don't, it's at least damage control. I know that I have a tendency to think that once I've messed up the week, it's just easier to start over after my weigh-in. That has been responsible for a lot of those little upward ticks you see on my weight chart. I think that a better strategy is starting over right now. At the very least, I can keep the gain small, and not have to face the results of the kind of four-day free-for-all this thinking usually inspires. My friend M. from my meetings has told me she thinks it's brave to write things down even when I'm screwing up. I think it's the only choice I have, really. Keeping my journal pretty by only writing down the good days doesn't help me or anyone else. And, as my leader said a few weeks ago, "The body keeps an accurate journal, no matter what we write down."

6 comments:

  1. I think that once we can master tracking our calories during those times when we'd rather forget, and getting back on track again is the number once key to lifetime maintenance. It sounds like you've figured that out and are on the right track. Now, the hard part, doing it! Hang in there, you're going to make it!!!

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  2. Yep, when you know you are over it just encourages you to go ahead and splurge.

    I just did that Friday. We ate out with some friends so when I got home I knew I was over on points so I told myself it was a good time to eat something I normally wouldn't.

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  3. Good for you Jen. I love that quote by your leader. Brilliant.

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  4. Good Job for tracking it, I think it's the first step to realizing what your doing wrong, and like someone else mentioned...lifetime maintenance.

    We all screw up occasionally, it's just the ones that pick themselves up, dust themselves and get back on the wagon that make it!

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  5. I like the idea of damage control. What better time to start over than right after you've messed up?

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  6. Oh my gosh, Jen, I am so in the same boat! I just finished writing a post about this very same problem before I headed over here to say hello.

    You hit the nail on the head and you've inspired me to hold myself more accountable even when I don't want to face the numbers. I think it will save me a lot of grief.

    My new week starts Friday, so I am going to write every little (and big) thing down. I pray that I can do a little better staying on track this week, though.

    Congrats on facing such a scary thing!

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"Count your calories, work out when you can, and try to be good to yourself. All the rest is bulls**t." -- Jillian Michaels at BlogHer '07